This Is How I Feel, XX

Thought it might be helpful if I stared adding the kids ages to each post: 
Eli, 22 months; Colette, eight weeks. 

When someone mentions the vaccinations debate.


When someone makes sleeping jokes and everyone in the room is laughing, but I can't because I'm still living it. 



After I get Colette to fall asleep in my arms, put her in the rock n'play, only to hear her begin to cry five minutes later. 


Coming downstairs after I successfully put both kids down for a nap at the same time.


When Eli's supposed to be sleeping and I hear a bunch of huge thumps.


When I caught Eli dropping toilet paper in to the toilet, then pulling it back out and sucking on it and I didn't want to deal with it so I pretended not to see it and told my husband to go look.

When I tried to put on a Moby Wrap for the first time. 


When Mike comes home with Starbucks and the kids are in my path to reach him. 




When I make a stupid comment in front of a bunch of people because I'm severely sleep deprived and don't even care. 


When walking the aisles of Target and I spot an end cap full of 50,000 stuffed animals/balls/trucks that I know Eli will want to hold. 


When I try to get dressed in the morning after the kids got up a collective 485 times during the night.


Every morning I woke up over 40 weeks pregnant and I realized that Colette had still not shown up.

When Mike tells me to go upstairs and take a nap, while he watches the kids. 


Want more? Find 'em all, righta' here.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Taylor, while I'm saddened to hear you can relate, I'm so thankful you took time to write. It is sad how downplayed it is, I think I might have found healing faster if I knew more about it and that it was something that could happen after birth. I'm sorry to hear you had a traumatic birth as well, I wish you all the best in your healing!

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