Mostly voices. Telling me this or that. Pressuring me, pushing me, making me feel and think and just generally confusing me. It's pretty hard for me to tell them apart, even on a good day.
I'll get an idea, one I think is pretty good, and two seconds later the voices will tell me it was dumb. That it'd never work.
I'll be inspired to try something new, do it for a few days feeling like it was completely worth it, then on day four the voices decide it's not worth it and I'd rather sleep.
I'll write something here or on social media believing it's worth hitting "publish" and after an hour the voices I listen to want to change it, feeling like it wasn't good enough.
And then suddenly, the voices tell me I'm a terrible, failure of a mom.
Dr. Martin Loyd Jones said, "Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself?"
When we listen, all we hear is why we should give up. Why we can't do it. Why we're not cut out to be good moms, wives, friends, employees or business owners. And sometimes, it feels kind of good to give ourselves a pity party, to mumble and blather around, dwelling in our woe-is-me state, but when we do this, we only hear the negative - all the struggles and roadblocks, they're just exacerbated and deepened until we are depressed and paralyzed.
But when we talk to ourselves, we tell ourselves truth. That we can do this. That we have been made specifically to mother these children. That our failures don't define us. When we talk to ourselves, we remind ourselves that we have what it takes - through using words, scriptures and quotes, we find the encouragement we need to keep going.
As moms, we can throw ourselves a pity party pretty easily. By the witching hour each day, you can bet I'm on the verge of one, and the voices in my head are running a mile a minute, no matter how the day has gone. So that's when I start talking to myself, I tell myself to snap out of it, preaching truth to myself instead of letting myself listen to all the ways I screwed up that day. I reminded myself of who I am, what I can do, and what has been done for me.
In the moment, I don't usually feel or believe everything I'm saying. But that's not what it's about. Talking to yourself is about reminding yourself of truth over and over again until you do believe it.
This is what you do when you feel stuck or lost and like a failure. This is the key to how you reach what feels like unattainable goals. This is secret to finally pursuing that dream you've been pushing down deep in your heart. This is how you mother well until the end of the day.
So the next time you hear the voices in your head, instead of listening, start talking.